#23 Let Me In

Dear Rache,

Q: What’s the perfect way to waste good money and time?

A: Watch Let Me In!

Earlier today, I was out with a good friend of ours. Let us call her TG. And because she likes watching movies, we agreed to watch one. The problem was she wanted to see Let Me In, while I was thinking of watching Unstoppable. You know I don’t like scary movies, much less those about vampires. They suck. But because I made her go to High Street, I thought it was only fair to make her decide.

The movie was boring. I am the biggest coward on earth, and I was NOT scared. What the hell is wrong with this movie? I could have slept while watching it had it not been for TG talking to me. So yes, TG talks while watching.  Do not sit beside her while watching movies. JUST KIDDING, TG!!! =)

As I was seated there, in my mind, I kept blaming TG for making me watch this bad movie. On second thought, maybe I did tell her out loud that it was her fault we had to watch that. I love Chloe Moretz (I’m a Hit Girl fan) and I didn’t hate the others in this movie (I did sympathize with Owen, the bullied kid), but to the writer and the director of this “horror” film: YOU FAILED BIG TIME. You failed to scare the biggest chicken on earth. You failed to make the crowd scream of fear. Heck, you failed to make the audience react. You failed in your idea of a vampire. You failed when you made Chloe Moretz say the line, “I’m 12. But I’ve been 12 for a really long time.” It’s like you’re begging the audience to hate you and your movie.

But you did succeed in some things. If you wanted Chloe Moretz to be a blond Gollum on screen, then congratulations. If you wanted to waste good talent (Chloe Moretz, et al.), congratulations! If you wanted the audience to sleep or just talk to each other for the duration of the movie, then congratulations again. If you wanted to be hated for wasting good money, then congratulations!!!

The movie, by the way, is about a bullied boy, Owen (Kodi Smith-McPhee), who befriends Abby (Moretz), who turns out to be Gollum a vampire. She then kills the bullies (Hence the “She will protect you” tag on the movie poster.). That is my bad summary of this bad movie.

The only time I felt any emotion while watching was when Owen was bullied. Those kids should not be called bullies. They are TERRORISTS! They make you love the “bullies” in our school. They make you realize how the kids in our school are so much more secure.

Rating:
I asked TG if we could NOT finish the movie and just go out. But we suffered through the end anyway. And the moment the credits rolled, as we were making our way out of the cinema, TG and I never even talked about the movie.

I hope the original movie (Let the Right One In (2008)) is way better than this.

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About 500 Movies for Rache

Rache is one of our friends, who, though smart and wonderful in every way imaginable, is particularly deficient in terms of her film knowledge. Now no friend of ours can be allowed to go on believing that movies such as Batang X and Little Mermaid 2 represent the height of cinematic excellence. And so, it is with a mixture of compassion and messianic complex, that we've decided to watch and review 500 movies for Rache, until March 31, 2011. There are three of us behind this blog, and we have decided that there is only one way to go about the movie-picking and reviewing process: indiscriminately. We will sit through the campy and the compelling, the indie films and the blockbusters, the critics' darlings and the straight-to-video. This is how much we love you Rachel. This is also - let's face it - how much we love ourselves. By March of 2011, we hope to have a good cross-section of cinematic genres, traditions, cultures and periods. (But in all likelihood, it will be mostly Hollywood fare). So Rache, our dear, pretty, wonderful, cinematically-clueless friend, and the many others just like her, THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU.
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