#10 My Last Five Girlfriends

Dear Rache,

The Frech fabulist and poet Jean de la Fontaine once said, C’est un betail servile et sot a mon avis Que les imitateurs. Translation: Imitators are a slavish herd and fools in my opinion. And if de la Fontaine is proven wrong, the movie My Last Five Girlfriends (MLFG) is definitely the exception.

Having seen and enjoyed High Fidelity (HF), I became curious about MLFG. Both movies work around the same idea: a guy looking back at five of his failed relationships. However, while Rob (John Cusack), the lead in HF, looks back at his “Top 5 Most Memorable Breakups” in an attempt to know why things always go wrong for him in relationships, Duncan (Brendan Patricks) tried to kill himself and failed. This character is such a failure, and so is this film. And while John Cusack is adorably adorably adorable, Breandan Patricks is nothing like him. By the way, both HF and MLFG are based on the literary works of Nick Hornby and Alain de Botton, respectively.

The only thing that could have saved this movie from being a total wreck was using “the world’s first theme park devoted to a complete nobody,” where the nobody was Duncan, and the attractions/rides are named after his last five girlfriends. But the film failed even at that.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Imitation is suicide.” And this holds true for this film.

Memorable quote:
NONE.

Memorable scene:
NONE.

Rating:
I have no idea why I bothered watching until the end, but if you love yourself and your life, do not watch this movie. Watch High Fidelity instead.

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About 500 Movies for Rache

Rache is one of our friends, who, though smart and wonderful in every way imaginable, is particularly deficient in terms of her film knowledge. Now no friend of ours can be allowed to go on believing that movies such as Batang X and Little Mermaid 2 represent the height of cinematic excellence. And so, it is with a mixture of compassion and messianic complex, that we've decided to watch and review 500 movies for Rache, until March 31, 2011. There are three of us behind this blog, and we have decided that there is only one way to go about the movie-picking and reviewing process: indiscriminately. We will sit through the campy and the compelling, the indie films and the blockbusters, the critics' darlings and the straight-to-video. This is how much we love you Rachel. This is also - let's face it - how much we love ourselves. By March of 2011, we hope to have a good cross-section of cinematic genres, traditions, cultures and periods. (But in all likelihood, it will be mostly Hollywood fare). So Rache, our dear, pretty, wonderful, cinematically-clueless friend, and the many others just like her, THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU.
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3 Responses to #10 My Last Five Girlfriends

  1. beembee says:

    Hey guys! I have been a fan since day one and all I can say is, bravo! Bravo for taking the time to review and revisit the films such as the ones posted. Bravo for making us aware of what you watch everyday. Bravo because you are all taking the time to do it for a friend. Might I say, Impressive, as well! I don’t think i can ever dedicate myself to watching a film everyday. I wish there are more of us here commending you. Don’t worry, I’ll tell my friends about you guys! Keep it up! 🙂

  2. We love you too! And you are our co-conspirator in The Education of Rachelle De Guzman. Thank you very much, if you keep reading, we’ll keep watching. (meh ganon?)

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